wNaked News
In which my articles, poems and random thoughts will appear. See also my website at stewalbert.com


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wSaturday, January 04, 2003


Achooo


Bush
vacationing at his ranch
then
emerging
and
speaking before soldiers
who are
ordered
to
cheer.

Some reporters
notice
a
new seriousness
in his
manner.
No kidding around.
No stupid jokes.

Some reporters
think
maybe
there is
a
new
gravitas
in this
mediocre man.

Bush friends
insist
he just has
a
bad
cold.


-------------------
Death and the Minister

Chile's
Minister of Defense
is
a
woman
a
socialist
and
torture
victim
of the old Junta.
And
her father
was
tortured to death
by the
pro-US Pinochet
gang.

She sees her former persecutors
in
the elevator
every day.

We have our own torturers now
in
Guantanamo
and
Israelis have them.
The smiling guy with the lawn mower
on a sunny Sunday,
he might be
cutting down
more
than
grass.

Chile's
a democracy now
and
most of the criminals have gone unpunished
they accept democracy
they have their old jobs.
It's all very cozy
victims
and
torturers
together in
the
new society.
Though
Chile's
Minister of Defense
probably wont turn her back
in
the
elevator.



posted by stew at 11:44 AM


wFriday, January 03, 2003


Light & Darkness

Venezuela
wants to form
an
Axis
of
Good.

Cuba and Brazil
may
second the motion.

Do you want join?

Fight for
senior citizen
discounts
on
visits
to
Viagra Falls?
And
ample prime
TV time
for
Bigfoot
to reply
to his
critics?

We know an Axis of Evil
is
based on
end of the road
desperation
isolation
and
constipation.
What flowers
goodness?

Crowded subways?
Bad TV programs?
A frozen wasteland of empty compassion
and
fetish fantasies of fantastic violence?

Out of darkness comes the light?
The hope?

Join the axis of good!
Sign up today!
Tell me
what
it
is.


posted by stew at 9:00 AM


wThursday, January 02, 2003


I ain't got no home

Multitudes
of
species migrating
because
of
global warming
find
new imperfect homes
with
much
less
sweet
support
sustenance.

Returning
to
Kabul
500,000
Afghan refugees
find nothing
but bombed out buildings
starvation
and
an
ice cold
winter
of
global frozen soul.




Read all about it!

In the NY Times
Palestinians are murdered
on
Page 8
In the NY Times
Israelis are murdered
on
Page 1


posted by stew at 9:01 AM


wWednesday, January 01, 2003


Big Bush with Everything

Bush
got vexed by a reporter
just before eating
his
favorite
Texas cheeseburger.

The President was entering a favorite eatery.
"The best in the West!"
I guess the guy delayed him.
Bush must have been
hungry
and
grouchy.

"I'm the only one who decides about war!
And when it starts.
Not you,"
he snarled.

All those centuries
of
Constitutional debate
about
who has war making power.
(Shhh! It's Congress)
and
it just comes down
to
Bush having a temper tantrum
over
a
cheeseburger.

---
Happy New Year to all those who drop in on this page and also http://hometown.aol.com/stewa/stew.html . Let's all hope for a benevolent miracle.
--Stew



posted by stew at 9:57 AM


wTuesday, December 31, 2002


I was only.....

Obeying orders
isn't supposed to be
a free pass
when soldiers murder
innocent people.
Eichman said he
was
only
obeying orders
(said he admired Jews)
and
Israel
hung him high.

But if soldiers
can
pick
and
choose
their orders
like at
a
super market sale,
Nazi lawyers predicted,
there would be
chaos
social disorder
Yippie hysteria
and
riots at Soccer Games.


Israel's Supreme Court
has just ruled
in favor
of
order.
Soldiers may not chose
to
refusnik service
on the West Bank and Gaza
even
if they believe
the occupation
is
illegal
criminal
and
it sucks.
Order must be obeyed
for reasons of State
and
not
conscience.
Israeli judges
also
fear
Yippie hysteria
and
riots
at
Soccer Games.



Good-bye Mr. K

Ring out the old,
Lord of the Ringers
Henry Kisinger,
had
to quit public life.
His lie
was
too
obvious.




posted by stew at 9:41 AM


wMonday, December 30, 2002


Eating Out


No buildings were standing
in
North Korea
when its 1950s war
with
America
came to a halt.
A
nation
bombed
flat.
Tough characters these Koreans
they dusted themselves off
proclaimed
"Juche"
(self reliance)
and
with very hard feelings
they
began
rebulding
their
hatred.

Powell
is not anxious
for
a
rematch.

This time
the
NK's
have missiles that can hit California
maybe
Oregon
and
certainly all of our South Korean investments.

Powell
figures Clinton was too tough on the N.K.s,
too threatening,
we
just
need diplomacy,
there's no crisis.
Just give him some time.

Besides,
we intend to eat Iraq.
Powell thinks Rumsfield
is
being a glutton,
wanting to chomp
Iraq
and
North Korea
at the same moment.

Mind your table manners Rummy!
A gentleman dines
with
decorum
care
and
concentration.
First one course
and
than
another.




posted by stew at 8:57 AM


wSunday, December 29, 2002


The Rich and the Super Stupid


How did we get so ignorant?
Time Magazine
reveals
that
20% of us think we are in the top 1% of income
and
20% more, believe they will eventually be in the top 1%.
Is that why Americans
don't riot
every time
Bush
cuts taxes for
the
rich?
Americans think they will gain huge dividends?
Maybe get in the
top
top
0.50%?

How did we get so stupid?
Maybe it's because nobody tell us the truth?
When the Census Bureau surveys American income
they
cut it off at a million bucks a year.
(It used to be $300,000)
But in 1996
Michael Eisner
made a cool $565 million
and
it
wasn't
averaged
in!
It doesn't count in determining just how high
the
top 1%
will fly.
Look at it this way,
we play with blocks
that rise yards
and
their toys
build
Eiffel Towers.

Dumb us
believing
a
tiny mouse
can grow up
to be
a
large
rat.



posted by stew at 11:31 AM